The reason I’m writing about this today is not to pick on typical human nature but to rather assess my own self.
Why don’t people do the best for themselves, like they would do someone else?
I think I truly do understand it, thanks to people like Jordan Peterson who opened my eyes to the answer, but I still want to write about it here so I can do some self-assessment whilst I go over it.
One of the big things here is that you understand your inner demons, you get to look at them at any point in the day where you’re quiet enough to let them seep through.
And for that reason, when it comes to doing the best things for yourself, you think you don’t ‘deserve it’ because you, on some level, believe you’re not worthy of being your best self.
This is precisely why we hold others to a better standard because we can’t see their demons (they are hidden from us) and we can only see what they show us, which in most cases is only the good things of said person.
That’s why we hold them to better standards and want only the best for them.
Jordan Peterson, in one of his books, wrote about this.
And essentially said that you should treat yourself how you would treat a friend or family member; if you’re going to do something that might not be good for you, you should question it and act as if you’re telling a friend what to do.
This way, you would only choose the best option for yourself.
This is an immediate fix, but I think the problem is rooted much deeper than just not wanting the best for yourself because you see your own demons.
I think it goes on the level of not loving yourself.
Self-love is difficult to achieve, since any hiccup in your day, that could even be something as small as not making your bed could really set you down a path of hating yourself for that particular day.
And these days stack up upon themselves.
If you had self-love you’d WANT and ONLY WANT to pick the best choice for yourself.
So that you can ultimately be the best version of yourself in the end.
On top of this, it’s about repositioning your actions.
What I mean by this is, don’t just think that drinking soda is going to only affect you and your body; think of it another way, it’s going to affect those around you.
“Well, Jayce, how does drinking a soda affect others around you?”
Let’s say you drink a soda, which is bad for your body.
Sure one isn’t bad, but if you drink one every day, your body isn’t going to be in the best shape.
One day you might require that body to get you out of a shitty situation, whether that’s a house fire or a bar fight with your friends.
If you had spent the time eating and drinking better, you would have been able to save yourself and your friend from having broken jaws.
This is a really extreme positioning, since these scenarios are less than likely, but they CAN happen.
And even if they don’t.
What are you really getting out of that soda?
You feel good for a couple of minutes.
Really worth it.
Finishing things off…
What I’m trying to say is that everything affects you, and everything that affects you affects those around you.
So even if you don’t have self-love just yet, at least think about what your actions can do to the people you love and make sure you’re only choosing the best possible options for those around you.
(of course, don’t pick things just for them, you need to understand how your actions will affect you too)